I can. . . what I think you’re really looking for is an existing, but developing genre of quality within adult films. Sadly, most of the “erotic” films produced these days are intended for a male audience and meant as a replacement for actual sexual interaction, not an appetizer for the same.
The desire to watch erotica as a couple is natural, but the films that balance male and female desires are rare. I would highly suggest you check out offerings from Erika Lust, who we consider to be the premiere producer and curator of sex positive, female friendly, yet explicit, films. You can view these at a number of different sites:
If you have not seen Erika’s TED talk on “It’s Time for Porn to Change”, it can be viewed at TED’s site or here on YouTube. She provides an inspiring perspective on how we can improve our portrayals of sexuality to be more balanced.
Our own efforts at Spark Erotic are very much in line with your desires. We’re an independent film company based in Colorado with a female director and a vision to produce erotica that honors everyone involved. Women’s objections to much of what is produced are valid because they are often simply objectified without much thought for what turns them on. There is a different way. . .